Seeking Knowledge & Wisdom

Lately I have been feeling a little incompetent at work. Tonight I just cried out to God for knowledge and a since of wisdom! What came to mind was Proverbs 2 about Moral Benefits of Wisdom. Verses 2-5 read, "turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding, and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God". I'm not sure if the writer was talking about nursing knowledge and wisdom but for me, I could find some application.

I really started to feel this since of (for lack of better words) "stupidity" this past year as our census and acuity levels have been low across the network in the NICUs; which is good for the babies but bad for the nurses. I'm definitely one of those people where the saying, "you don't use it, you lose it" applies. I would never pray for more sick babies, just that God would grant me the wisdom to know what to do for the ones that I care for.

Recently I took my RNC (certification in NICU) exam and unfortunately,it did not go well. So my feeling of incompetence rose even higher and I really beat myself up over the poor results for days. I started questioning my abilities and really examining myself as one of the 'leaders' that I am suppose to be in our unit. The pressure is really on now to prepare better for my retest. Still I am comforted by these words from Isaiah, "For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you."

Thank you Lord for your precious Word that I can turn to when things don't make since and I need wisdom, knowledge and comfort. Please be with me at work and help me to see 'the big picture' when it comes to my clinical understanding and studying for my retest; and above all else thank you for you mercy and love...